ode to unemployment

after bitching through january, employment came knocking on my door. if you note the lack of facebooking, tweeting and blogging, you may realize that i really am exhausted and too busy for such things i loved so much before. here i sit, four weeks down in the good ol work place and i’d like to tell you about what i miss, because damn, i did not take advantage of unemployment like i should have; well, wait, maybe i did, but now that i had a taste of the sin of slothyness, being without it is oh so harsh.

MY ODE TO UNEMPLOYMENT

GET DOWN WITH LAZINESS

the amount of tv i watched during unemployment was borderline embarrassing. nah, i’ll just call it making up for lost time... yeah definitely not embarrassing. barely watching tv the last four years, deserved a few months of turning my brain to mush via showtime, mtv, cbs sitcoms and every show in between…seriously.  dexter: 4 seasons down in few quick weeks. californication: tore through 3 of the seasons in less than a month, began watching multiple shows every night, faithfully (no soap operas, mind you, but i did watch those occasionally while i was at the gym during lunch time), rewatched all of it’s always sunny in philadelphia and that’s not even it, but i’ll just give you that to save what is left of my diminishing dignity.

oh, can’t forget about the history channel: gangland, ancient aliens, modern marvels, just to name a few, which all contributed to my laziness and then craziness to follow. the cooking channel: hi, show me food, i’m not going to cook it, but i’ll stare and salivate for half hour while you try to teach me something and i’ll just continue to get hungrier.

I'M SO UNCOMFORTABLE

if you know me, you probably can picture me in sweat pants and some quirky shirt i picked up at goodwill. that’s my thing; i will rock stupid and totally irrelevant-to-me t-shirts, shamelessly, all day every day and i wish i still could. i am just not a dress up every morning person and here is why: i have really shitty hair, it goes flat at about 8:05 so that’s a good look to keep up until 5pm, sorry customers you will have absolutely no eye candy while you're working with me. sorry i'm not sorry. and i think i just reject looking nice. no matter how many times i iron or dry clean something i ends up getting wrinkly or stained midday. i swear i'm giving looking nice my best effort, but i guess it just isn't sticking.

also, dry shampoo is a saint. sure i’ll snooze my alarm a few more times and then spray this on my head so it looks like i took the time to shower this morning. bing bang boom, my hair is still challenged, at best, but at least it looks like i tried.

COMMUNICATION WITH THE REAL WORLD

now that i’m not close to any of my friends (geographically) i get so many fewer texts, facebook posts and tweets. because i need more reason to feel like a real person?? Come on people, send me a drunk text about how some townie is hitting on you at the bar or that you woke up at your ex boyfriend’s place, pissed off in the morning… man, i miss those. at least i have gotten too lazy to unsubscribe to job search sites and i get daily e-mails; i look forward to hearing from you, daily, communicationsjobs.com and monster, my most faithful friends, want to hang out sometime?

on the subject of communication with the real world, i really have gotten quite lame since working. i’m now transitioning into a more mature place in my life, which is fantastic, but i do miss the debauchery of college and pre-unemployment.  all i want to do is sleep and sleep, not quite how my weekends used to be, but i'm managing. 

i also miss late nights and late afternoons; my time of sleep and my time of waking for the last four years. my mind works best late at night, giving me some of my best ideas for writing, but i guess we all have to make sacrifices to soldier on in the real world, right?

look at this transition... success?

so i leave you with this, i am extremely thankful for all my new opportunities, learning a lot, enjoying moving forward in my life, but if you have free time, savor it while you can.

cheers!

so this is the new year?

hi, hello- welcome to 2011. it's a solid week-ish into the new year and i've made some observations, been in some comical situations and other things i just feel like rambling about to you.

seriously, ben gibbard said it best "so this is the new year, and i don't feel any different. so this is the new year, and i have no resolutions, for self assigned penance, for problems with easy solutions". i feel exactly the same, ben. (we talk about the new year together, obviously) as i noted in an earlier post, i don't really make any "new year's resolutions" i think they are silly and making one would just make me more apt to break it so i will continue to just try to do things better. i've added to my list since my post about it. i've added on: be less lazy and be more responsible. two things i could definitely be better at. so far, they're going alright (besides the day i spent watching 'ancient aliens' on the history channel from about 2pm until 7pm... oops (and seriously i may be convinced that there are aliens now. sweet, unemployed and crazy.))

i spent the holidays in florida. it was pretty great, nice to get away from the blizzards in michigan and spend some time by the ocean with my family and my second family (my best friend and her fam). ate some delicious seafood, hung out on the beach, got to see my sisters who live down south, went to the wizarding world of harry potter to embrace my inner nerd. good times were had by all.

my holiday "break" was fantastic, overall, except it's not really a break for me anymore, since my whole life is a break (insert something about unemployment). i've gotten to see a lot of friends who only come here when holidays need celebrating because let's be real, even though it's 2011, this is still not a happening spot. a lot of my friends are guys, because, besides my close knit group of gal pals, i'd rather hang out with dudes.. "bro out" if you will. put too many females together and shit turns out like that show bad girls club and that just isn't for me. 
 
firstly i'd like to give a little shout out to my friends meg and jordan. meg will be moving to la after she graduates in may, to do baller hollywood-ish things. jordan just got accepted into the peace corps and will be in africa, making the world a better place for 27 months. i'm gonna miss em. but for now i'll just cherish this picture of us tailgating, because let's be honest, those were the best of times.

my good friend blair and i have been buds since we were little, like really little. we used to hang out because our grandparents are friends, cute, i know. blair was a little bit rambunctious compared to me. he compared the two of us like this: "you were such a pleasant little child, playing in the water and building sand castles, i was swearing, burning ants and stealing gum from the gas station on my tricycle." hey, at least my friends are entertaining and drama free, but hopefully we'll just stay away from the juice filled gum when we stop in to fill up on gas. 


another good friend of mine, from college, took a little road trip over the holiday to good ol' pasadena, california. you guessed it, rose bowl. my friend andy, wisconsin native, lover of america's dairy land gave me all the highlights of the road trip. my favorite was his leg through liberal, kansas, home of the liberal bee jay's baseball team. if that team isn't the butt of many jokes, it is now... don't worry i already checked out their website, they currently are sold out of merchandise, but you better believe i'll be checking back with them. popular team, i tell ya. on andy's much sadder return trip he called me while driving solo back to good ol valparaiso, indiana. "i've got four cases of beer and a block of cheese in my trunk." on wisconsin.


in other news new year news; i've made some solid gym observations. the first of the year always sparks interest for people to finally get into shape. for my gym, there are lots of characters who have been around since the new year began. 
exhibit a) lady who wears nice sweaters, big 80's style scrunchies and knit leggings, at least she remembered her gym shoes. flashdance?
exhibit b) older guy who thinks he's super studly that has a barbwire tattoo from his wrist all the way to just below his armpit... whatya protecting up there with that barbed wire, brahhh?
exhibit c) numerous people who have obviously never set foot in a gym, i give it a month, happy new year, thanks for coming out, better luck next year.


in some totally unrelated news, i started writing occasionally for a music company (veoba.com), if you enjoy my taste in music/my writing style you should check it out. it's a really cool company so maybe you can find something you like on there.

also, i updated a bio page, located in the right hand corner of my page "halbs in a nutshell" check it out, it has all sorts of useful/not useful information.

ta ta for now.

it's been real, 2010

2010 was a pretty solid year year; so as a recap i'd like to give you a few of my favorite moments, things and whatnot. enjoy yourselves...

favorite new obsession: dexter. now that is a show that will suck you in. freaking vacuum effect. it doesn't hurt that michael c. hall is one sexy serial killer. i've torn through 4 seasons in the blink of an eye, losing sleep and sanity along the way... i'm not complaining, he can wrap me up in saran wrap any day of the week.

favorite new show: boardwalk empire. early america, gambling, illegal activity, sex and booze. need more explanation?

favorite album of the year: sigh no more, mumford and sons. instantly fell in love with this album in the spring of 2010 and then later it, coincidentally, helped me through a rough period of time. very solid mix of sounds on the album-- i'd describe most of it as poetic; most lines are really amazing if you just take a listen, it's really worth checking out... no more than checking out, falling in love with.

favorite song: way back home, band of horses. this quickly became my favorite song of 2010-- whether it was cruising around rural valpo, driving on the coast of lake erie on my way to upstate new york, or while approaching the chicago skyline, this song marked a lot of monumental events for me. jamming to it among good friends will help me to always remember the song accompanied by those great memories.

favorite sookhai/halbert adventure: post graduation trip to northern michigan. house on the grand traverse bay, wine tasting, general merriment, great food and beautiful northern michigan. great way to end my summer with my family and my second family.

favorite reunion: homecoming 2010. reuniting with valpo friends from across the country, getting to see my long lost friend from jersey while she took a break from gtl and participating in shotgun contests, champagne breakfasts and shenanigans of every kind with some of my favorite people.

favorite holiday: st. patrick's day in chicago. if you've never done this, do it. it was my first time and it was amazing. day full of whiskey, car bombs and whatever else we could get our hands on and running into friends all over the city. even though we passed out before we could go party with lmfao (i'm serious) it was still an amazing celebration and it was ok doing shots shots shots without them, we lived.

favorite bar night: black wednesday. enough said? i think not. wandering out to the shitty bars in our hometown with my my four best friends from home. forced to converse with people we haven't seen since high school while laughing and cheersing the night away. who better to combat awkward encounters with than your best friends? night completed by taco bell and alex's dad as our dd, now that was amazing.

favorite new internet sensation: stumbleupon. i can't imagine anyone not liking stumbleupon. you pretty much gear it to whatever you want to see, and bam, magic-- every website on the internet is sorted through and the stuff you are looking for comes to you. the music ones are the best and are always practically perfect for what i want. 

 favorite new beverage: dirty vodka martinis. yes, i'm turning into a housewife, judge me, i am. but hey, any beverage with delicious green olives, olive juice and the rest containing alcohol is a-ok with me. sh sh shaken not stirred (i'm kevin gnupoor).

favorite new afternoon activity: hanging out with my mom (aka chalbs), watching shows we recorded from the night before, since we fall asleep too early to watch them. so maybe my favorite new afternoon activity is acting like a retired person... early bird specials anyone?

favorite new crew: "the fam" spring 2010 brought a new group of people together to cause madness collectively; lots of adventures with some of the greatest people i know. the kind of friends, i wish everyone could have and people i truly consider family.

favorite event: (23rd) biiiiiiiithday. i blogged about it, you should know, it was the shit. i mean maybe i'll live my life like that every day, someday; free bottle service, vip, or in the words of "ice cream paint job" rollin' like a big shot. until then, i'll just savor the one night where i didn't have to dream of revelry. 

favorite college event: beer olympics. what's up team u.s.a. for me it was my second straight victorious year overall and as shotgun champ, boom. this year was somehow even sweeter. probably one of the most amazing events held at valpo ever, great day, right before everyone started real life. so much success. let's just say we had a great time in the backyard of 809 brown. (i mean graduation was great too, but there was no beer there)

hope you enjoy some of my favorites of 2010. i've already failed on one of my "things to be better at in 2011" by slacking on my blogging, oops, well it's not 2011 yet, i'll start being better at it, now. have a safe and happy new years eve everyone, it's 9:00am, pop some champagne and enjoy your last day of 2010.

life is a beach, i'm just playin' in the sand

my favorite time to dig into new music is when i have a long drive ahead of me. luckily for me, i recently received a variety of new jams and was on my way out of town for the weekend for a little drive through the midwest.

girl talk | all day

 mood: ready to go out and rage? your hanging in a grungy college basement drinking cheap beer out of solo cups, lots of dancing and singing involved. do you appreciate music of the past blended with music of today? listening to girl talk makes me feel like i'm at perry's stage at lollapalooza. beautiful chaos. when i listen to it in my car, it's like a dance party and gregg gillis is my own personal dj.
gregg gillis never disappoints; in my opinion, every girl talk album gets progressively better (night ripper, feed the animals, all day) and the latest album dropping november 15th was no exception. complete musical bliss, mashing up to 6 songs at once. so for my road trip i was very excited for some of gregg’s musical genius, since girl talk is some of my favorite music to drive and jam to. 

here are some of my favorite mashup's on this album, track by track

oh no:

ice cream paint job - dorrough + strawberry letter 23 - the brothers johnson

let it out:

twerk -project pat + mr. blue sky - electric light orchestra  

mr. big stuff - jean knight + pretty girls - wale ft. gucci mane

that's right:

in your eyes - peter gabriel + break u down -slim ft. red cafe + hot spot -foxy brown + closer - nine inch nails

jump on stage:

shimmy shimmy ya - ol' dirty bastard + creep - radiohead

lovegame - lady gaga + hey ladies - beastie boys + lust for life - iggy pop

this is the remix:

gangsta luv - snoop dogg ft. the dream + the jump off - lil kim ft. mr cheeks +i want you back -the jackson 5

get low - lil jon and the eastside boys ft. ying yang twins + sunday bloody sunday - u2 + cecilia - simon and garfunkel 

on and on:

i want it all - birdman ft kevin rudolf & lil wayne + bizarre love triangle - new order

wetter - twista ft. erika shevon + with or without you - u2 + television rules the nation - daft punk

get it get it:

windowlicker - aphex twin + pretty boy swag - soulja boy

bang - rye rye ft. m.i.a. + just can't get enough - depeche mode

gossip folks - missy elliott ft. ludacris +. digital love - daft punk

down for the count:

layla -derek and the dominos + haterz everywhere - b.o.b. ft. rich boy + give it all you got - afro rican

can't get you out of my head - kylie minogue + bust a move - young mc

make me wanna:

wake up - arcade fire + money to blow - birdman ft drake & lil wayne + pony - ginuwine

steady shock:

alright - supergrass +  1st of tha month - bone thugs n harmony
black and yellow - wiz khalifa + paint it black - the rolling stones

every day:

 i just want to write this track off as my favorite. the first time i listened to it i was beyond excited to hear imagine as the closing song, i thought it was a perfect ending and all the songs mashed throughout the song were great as well.

*check out this website that shows all the mashups track by track, it's amazing and it showed me how many  songs were really in each mashup that i would have never realized.
girl talk - all day

 

arron dean | mpls

mood: mellow. a long drive into a midwestern sky or curled up in a warm sweater on a colorful fall day. the kind of music that will make you feel what he is feeling. the kind of music that will make you look back fondly on your past and better yet, look forward to the future.

i’m so happy to have stumbled upon this extremely talented artist, hailing from south africa. arron dean started following me on twitter, since a lot of my twitter rambling has to do with music. usually when random artists follow me, i don’t take much action, but for some reason, i decided to check him out and i’m so thankful i did. being a big fan or artists like sufjan stevens, bon iver and iron & wine, i instantly found a lot of similarities in arron dean’s music.

talking music with people is one of my absolute favorite things to do, so i had no problem reaching out to arron dean to find out a little more about him. he was extremely responsive and seems like a genuinely awesome guy. arron dean’s album mpls focuses on the midwest, which hits close to home for me. messaging back and forth with him (as well as doing a little reading about him), led me to find out that he traveled to the midwest as kind of a healing process and fell in love with the area. love, loss, hurt and forgiveness, with no hint of bitterness are the themes that tie this album together. i enjoyed hearing his journey, his challenges and moving forward with his life.

“somewhere close to 3 am, i’m in the same seat, while you’re drinking across the street. there’s nothing wrong with picking scabs, to open wounds, it’s the only way we know, what we lose” -unannounced.

jams from this album i would suggest starting with include: sleep without me, minneapolis, unannounced, i think i’ll be alright

i already find myself belting out lyrics to arron dean’s when i listen to his music. as soon as i started listening to him, i was captivated by his beautifully relatable lyrics and amazing voice. 

kid cudi | man on the moon vol II: the legend of mr. rager

mood: sitting around a dim room with your closest friends, empty bottles, thick atmosphere. laid back, calm, relaxed. let scott mescudi take you to a peaceful place, his peaceful state of mind... like you're floating on the moon with the man himself, whether or not you're taking off into the true cudi mentality.

i was itchin’ to get back in the cudi zone, awaiting the drop of his follow up album to man on the moon. i know this review is a little overdue but that’s okay, i like to make sure i’ve fully gotten into an album before i jump the gun on a review. 

my faithful college roommate of three years, ms. amanda berrios, introduced me to cudi and i’ve never looked back. i somehow knew i wouldn’t be disappointed by his second album, scott mescudi, is one of a kind. his style was something i quickly fell in love with; funky, smart, don’t-give-a-fuck attitude. i was excited to listen to this to come back to his mix of dark and mysterious with other tracks peppered with an all star lineup of artists featured throughout the album. 

favorite songs so far: revofev, marijuana, erase me (ft. kanye west), mr. rager, mojo so dope

i'd also like to note the comical discovery that the song marijuana is 4 minutes and 20 seconds long... naturally it's not a mistake, make sure to listen until the end of the track. you're a funny one, scotty. 

also, if you haven't heard kid cudi's song, the prayer, off of his mix tape, you should check it out. it's a great jam with band of horses the funeral, in the background, that's my kind of music. it's been around for a while but if you missed it-- here ya go.

kid cudi - they prayer 

in case you've been living under a rock, the beatles are now available on itunes. there is a complete box set version available for purchase or separate tracks and albums. this is the first time i think my mom had an urge to buy anything on itunes, it was a precious moment, jamming to the best of the beatles with my mom. if your music library is lacking some beatles, jump on it, now there are no excuses.

thank you, thank you, thank you, you're far too kind.

lovers & friends

thanks for supporting my comedic life by tuning in for the last few months.

i'm not sure how many of you stumbled upon my blog, but thanks for stopping by! i'm happy to say that since late october, my blog has been picking up a larger international audience. now my blog has been viewed in over 20 countries around the world, as near as canada and as far as china, australia and japan (plus many places in between). 

so i just wanted to say thanks for coming out and i hope my blog at least gives you some comedic relief from your daily grind, if not, well, at least i amuse myself.

special shout out to marty and jimmy who are viewing my blog from germany and have been giving me feedback via skype during their semester abroad :)

maybe this year will be better than the last

as i sit here, just into the second day of december, i wonder what's to come.. i have a few resolutions for my year, not necessarily things i will write down and call my "new year's resolution" but things i'd like to...well, improve on.

dying my hair less: it's going to fall out, seriously. maybe i should embrace the brunette in me, but every time i do that, i have an identity crisis and go back blonde... eh, time will tell, but i'll try to make it look less like straw, because that's just not attractive. sorry for the dye, damage, irons and aerosol shit i put all over you... please stay on my head a little longer so i can put off having a wig until a more socially acceptable time (i mean i'm no lil kim).

f

from left to right (top) winter 2009, spring 2008 +pimp cup, fall 2008
(bottom) fall 2008, spring 2009, today upon waking, sexy, i know.

being less of a scrub: really, i hate dressing up. it would be awesome to have a profession where i could wear: tights, camisoles, sweatpants, t shirts, sweatshirts, hats, beach dresses, no pants, insert other comfortable clothing. these are the clothes (or lack there of) i enjoy spending my time in. i have a lot of nice clothes, which i only use if a) going out socially b) important event c) need to impress someone (once impressed, will return to sweats and co).  unless i can find a job where i can dress like a bum 9-5, i'm going to have to figure it out and my real people clothes are going to have to come out of hiding.

leaving the past in the past: belt out a little cee lo green, take a deep breath. much better. so let's move on, shall we?

volunteer more: self explanatory? everyone could use a little more lovin'.

spend time improving lost skills: piano, those were the days, now i should work on being able to jam to some of my favorite piano rockers. brush up on the espanol again, those few semesters in college really made me hate it a) because i somehow tested into a higher level!? b) that lady's lisp (typical of some area in spain) distracted me way too much. so it's about time i buckle down with some flash cards and a margarita.

do what i want: seriously... there are so many things i want to do. ready, set, go.

be more normal when meeting new people: first impressions, not too bad at em, but after that i warm up to people far too quickly. i like being around people, but not everyone is like me, so i should probably ease into the process of introducing my awkward life. i'll work on it, ehhh, no promises.

blog more: i really failed in november. hi, not like i was doing anything constructive. i need to watch less tv (which will result in blogging more), because seriously, i've become  a housewife over here, i've been sucked into like 20 shows. but funny stuff still happens to me all the time and my life continues to be awkward and jobless so, more blogging, check.

so whatever your new year's resolution, aspirations for the future or just short term goals may be, make em good ones, and make one of them reading my blog more often. ta ta for now.

a very halbsy holiday

ah, the holidays.
i am one of those people that is anti christmas music until after thanksgiving, at least (except for when i forget to take off *nsync's, merry christmas, happy holidays and occasionally belt it out when it comes on my shuffle, mid june, of course). so thanksgiving marked the time for me to start doing some things excessively:
a) listening to christmas music, which absolutely includes sufjan steven's christmas album (it's heavenly, happy birthday jesus) b) wearing my uggs (go ahead, put me in the category of stereotypical ugg wearing girl, those bad boys are like walking on a cloud, go ahead, judge). c) watching home alone 2, lost in new york, repeatedly (i bought a dvd in china with all 4 of them on it, awesome (also don't argue with me, lost in new york is the best... shut up (amanda))

so this holiday, i was really excited to spend my thanksgiving weekend with close friends and family. sadly my sisters moved down south and i wont get to see them until the next holiday, (rough break, christmas time on the ocean? this is where kevin mccalister and i disagree, sorry kev, but i'm all about it)  so for our thanksgiving feast i was the lone grandchild in attendance since my cousins on the one side all have significant others and were doing that thing (please remind me more of my single life by leaving me as the only person under 55). 

let me just start off with black wednesday. hello, awesome. i think this is the first year i decided to venture out on the biggest bar night of the year, and let me just say, it did not disappoint. i knew going in, i'd get to see lots of people i hadn't in a long time (some i was excited to see, others i had no desire to see), so i knew it would be a mix of awesome, awkward and hilarious (which are three words that sum up my life pretty well). naturally, it was a little blurry at times, making sure to share some beverages among good friends before hitting the really lame bar scene that is my hometown. upon arrival, chaos. packed bars, lots of greetings, smiling until my face hurt, the whole nine yards. bumping into people that were bitches last time i saw them and didn't let me down... still bitches. people i dated that i have no idea why i dated them. people i dated who still pull the same bullshit they did years ago, ay yi yi. ever heard the song "all my exes live in texas", i really wish they did. but all in all, great night. did some embarrassing stuff, which is pretty standard. ended my night, in a bed, but not after alex's dad took us to taco bell, which was heavenly. my group of girlfriends consists of five of us who have stayed close throughout the years and who are actually doing something with our lives after high school. we all received a text from one of our good friends in the group in the morning, which may, to date, (besides texts from my friend martha) be the best text i've ever received. 

8:05am "last night = puddle. woke up with taco bell wrapper stuck to my face. my boyfriend says i demanded a quesadilla then immediately barfed it up. fail."

as the holiday weekend continued. we hosted a pretty baller feast at my home on thursday. it started out with my elderly grandmothers talking to each other about their hearing aids, which i listened to intently, dreading the day i complain about hearing aids, but chucked, because it was hilarious (sorry grams x 2). my mom and i drank wine and got everything together, we talked about travel over the feast, i got asked countless times what i'm doing with my life, "hi, still nothing". i've changed my answer to "ya know, just hanging out". i'm sure everyone loves to hear that after i spent 4 years at a private university. ooops. workin' on it.... still.

friday we host a big post thanksgiving party at my house. lots of good food, lots of beer lots of wine. awesome. this year was the 5th year. i'm very blessed to have close friends (whom i noted earlier) who's parents are also close with mine. so it's a combination of families and friends, ended up being 30+ people i would say. my friends and i have created a tradition, since the first time we had this shinding: buy lots of boones farm, chug it upstairs, return to party, chow down, return later for more boones farm. this year was no different (i'll grow up someday, maybe). when my mom found out that we have this boones farm tradition her response was

 "boones farm? really? i thought i raised you better than that."

...sorry mom, apparently not.

after the boones and grub we actually made it to the bar after. met up with some good friends, ended up piling 7 people into a monte carlo for the trip home, real cozy, then we waited for our friend jazzy to struggle to get into his house in the dark while we all heckled him, sorry (i'm not sorry) to your neighbors. saturday i was way too worn out from the food and alcohol hangover that started wednesday, so i decided on some quality times with my roommates/parents, luckily  i did because my dad, the comedian, had some wise words about staying fit after the glutenous activities we participated in over the weekend...

"when there's a will, there's a way.... WHEY PROTEIN!"

it saddens me that this could be my last thanksgiving like this, but hey, at least we made it a good one ;) until next time, from me and mine to you and yours, happy holidays.